I had just broke up with my boyfriend a couple hours before these people came for a visit. Each of them were doing what they could to cheer me up. Of course, there was the usual things said, but then one popped off with something that made my jaw drop.
“He wasn’t good enough for you, anyay.” A Frenemy
“You’ll find someone an hundred times better.” A Frenemy
The best way get over one is to get under another.A Frenemy
This last one stunned me. What the hell was she talking about? Did she really just tell me to have sex with some random male to get over the idiot that I just broke up with? I had to have heard her wrong.
“You didn’t just tell me I should get with some guy to get over that thing I threw out, did you?”
“Of course. Everyone knows that’s the best way to get over a heartbreak.”
“I’ve never heard such a rediculous thing in my whole life.” I said.
My mouth actually hung open while she explained in great detail the “logic” of such stupidity.
Although, to be fair, with all the males suddenly becoming my best friend, I chose one just to get the rest of them to leave me alone.
Damn! They were like ticks! They appeared out of nowhere and the bastards wouldn’t leave alone unless I ripped their head off!
Anyway, a couple of months later, I was listening to a few of my frenemies talking with each other. Once again, I heard something that made my mouth fall open.
“I would just steal a car, if I needed to get somewhere bad enough.” One said.
“I would have stolen a car, if I had a drivers license.” Another one said.
I felt, once again, like I had found myself in the twilight zone, except it didn’t make enough sense for the twilight zone!
Apparently, they didn’t mind going to jail for stealing a car, but they didn’t want to get caught driving without a license.
I don’t remember the first time I heard this next saying, but I know I didn’t have a clue what they were saying.
“I haven’t seen you in a minute.” Someone said.
“I know! It’s been what? Six months?” Another one said.
Is it just me, or is six months not even in the same ballpark as a minute?
What do you think? Have I moved to the twilight zone or am I just not understanding things?
Until next time…