First, a man walked into my apartment and brought with him all my missing parts. I don’t have them all in their proper places, but, at least, I finally have them all.
Memories flooded my mind. A boy with curly red hair and light blue eyes cuddling with me through the night, guarding against my nightmares.
Communication was very difficult because the boy wasn’t truly there. He was only there in spirit, as they say.
Who they are, I have no idea. I guess I never will, but I digress.
After he left, boytoy and I continued our usual crazy-making.People came and went. Time passed in the way that time does. I spent my time getting high, trying to hold onto whatever sanity I had left, and working on getting my writing going.
A couple of days went by in this manner. I was constantly on the look out for this man from my childhood.
Then, the man returned with a guitar. I didn’t understand it (still don’t), but he got frustrated about how the guitar was playing. After a little while, the man went home and the crazy-making continued.
Each visit had brought something to me I didn’t know I was missing.
The first visit brought interest in the outside world from Jenner.
The second visit was weird, because he was respectful of boytoy and kept his attention off me. Though, it strayed a few times.
The next day or the day after that, I kicked out boytoy. I didn’t care if I was alone for the rest of my miserable life, I couldn’t take his crazy making anymore.
So, there I was focusing on me and what I needed to do. At this point, that was get better because I was terribly sick.
Old Fashioned Manners
It was a couple of days later when this man from the past returned.
He said he wanted to get our numbers because he didn’t feel right coming over without calling first
(Wait. What? That’s an old fashioned way of thinking. I was stunned.)
“I kicked Boytoy out, but you can have my number if you want it.” I said.
?????? What the hell was I doing?
He stood there, blinking at me for a moment, then said, “Yeah. Sure.”
I opened the door to let him in and gave him my number.
He rushed off and I chalked him taking my number up as social graces. He was just being polite.
That evening, he called to see if he could come over.
I could barely speak I was so shocked.
I’m not going to tell you all the details, but they’re is more to come.
How did this man continue to surprise me?
What made me respect him when the only other men I have ever respected was my dad and my kids’s dad?
You’ll just have to come back for the next post.
Until next time…