Sometimes, I get reminded that I have a tendency to focus on the negative. That happened to me this week. A friend told me that I needed to let you know that Lover boy has some good points and isn’t a monster through and through.
I wanted to let you know that Lover boy isn’t a horrible monster all the time.
I’ve included some pictures of gifts he’s given me.
The first one I got last week was this ring. It’s pretty, don’t you think?
A beautiful unicorn necklace was the second gift I got last week.
Third, I got this other unicorn necklace.
A few days later, I got this necklace that needed to have the chain untangled before it broke just from the pressure of the chains tangles.
I’m writing this at three in the morning, on Mother’s Day 2019. I’m wondering I will get anything for Mother’s Day.
Last year I only one of my children told me happy Mother’s Day. It hurt. I guess I deserve it. After all, I wasn’t a very good mother. It’s hard to love someone who has no ability to love you back, even if they didn’t know it I’m sure they could feel it.
Anyway, I’m curious as to whether or not Lover boy will remember to wish me happy Mother’s Day. If no one reminds him, I think he will forget all about it. Though, he’s remembered to give his mother two gifts for Mother’s Day already. I have gotten nothing, yet. He’s still got twenty one hour to surprise me.
Back to the subject
Any time I go to Lover boy and hold him, he holds me back and doesn’t give me a hard time about anything.
He rarely says anything to me about things he doesn’t like about me. Only recently had he said, in another and frustration, that all I do is bitch and start fights with him.
I can see his point
After all, I am the one who gets angry when I find my belongings where they don’t belong because he’s gotten into my things without my knowledge and used them but forgot to put them away it was planning to use them again in a little while.
I’m the one who gets angry when I catch him in yet another lie.
I’m the one who gets angry when he has to go help his family when he’s said he would do something with me and it’s time to do it.
I’m the one who gets angry when we plan to spend time together and he asks to answer the phone when someone calls him. Or he texts his family back because they have texted him.
He says, “It’s just my family.”
He doesn’t think I should be upset. He doesn’t think that it should affect our intimacy at all.
He doesn’t understand that just asking to answer the phone or send a text tells me that he doesn’t want to spend time with me and that he would rather spend time with everyone but me.
I could be wrong for feeling this way, but he’s the one that wanted to spend time alone and, since I made arrangements for it, he’s done nothing but avoid it…
I’m hurt and angry that he’s got no respect for me, my feelings, or my needs.
I’ve decided to treat him the way he treats me. A total disregard for anything he wants or needs and a complete lack of understanding as to why he would be upset about this treatment.